среда, 28 декабря 2011 г.

How to find yourself=D




Hey my dear readers! This post is very important. it's about how to find yourself in life. and you Know i became very interested about is=)Finding yourself is an enlightening experience. You become self-sufficient and do things for others without expectations of something in return. You are no longer needy and become utterly grateful for all the things people have done for you in the past. Finding yourself is a time of harmony because you develop that philosophy or belief system that will carry you throughout the rest of your life. When you love yourself and who you are, you will savor and enjoy both life's pain and pleasures.

How do you know you have found yourself? When you are able to help others find themselves. Finding yourself is not easy. If you have never felt connected to who you are, and you want to find whatever makes you you, being yourself will be hard. The first step is always the hardest, but after that hill, you will be smooth sailing to discovering who you are. Make a goal for something you want to achieve whether being in a play or the all star of a football team or even just saying something to brighten someone's day.

Create your own life's life time line. Write down all of your major goals in your life that you feel you want to achieve. In turn, write down the events in your life that have already happened that you believe have affected you and have made you who you are now. This isn't an exercise in wallowing but one about clarification and identification of issues that might be hampering your present potential and the blossoming of your true sense of self.

Spend a little time writing with clarity about the past in your time line. As much as where you're headed is important, so is making peace with the past. A time line is an incredibly objective method for marking down past occurrences in your life that you consider to have been major. You can look at them as formation blocks and as changing experiences along your time line without imbuing them with too much emotion (as would occur within a diary account). Keep it simple, real and condensed to the major effect or lesson learned from each past incident.

When analyzing negative past experiences, look to the positive learning message in it and don't dwell on the mistakes or the negatives. Everyone has these blips in their time line but pretending they are either worse than they were or non-existent won't do you any favors. Instead, recognize that if it had not been for those past experiences you would not be where or who you are today.

Prepare to recommence with a clean slate. Develop your own moral conduct and practice sticking to it. Remove vice from your life; vices are any actions or habits that curtail your true self and involve escaping having to think about the harder questions and finding your true sense of self. Smoking, over-eating, and addictive-drinking are examples of lapses or habits that will prevent you from functioning at your peak while letting you "off the hook" of the hard internal analysis as to why you use these crutches instead of finding better ways to brighten your existence. This may take some major rehabilitation for some individuals but putting it into the too-hard basket won't make it go away. Remember, you can't drive your life forward if you are always gazing through your rear-view mirror!

Let go of the need to be loved by all and accept that some people still think you stink. The reality of life is that whatever you decide about forging ahead in a different way that is more focused on the person you see yourself as, some people won't be prepared to see you in a different or more forgiving light. Yet, it's important to forget about what everyone else thinks because you cannot please everyone. And while you might not want to disappoint the people close to you, they should want you to be happy. As long as you continue to exist to fulfill other people's ideas of who you should be, you'll never know your true talents, aptly summed up by Raymond Hull who once said: "He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away."

Learn to rely on yourself. At the heart of finding yourself is believing and relying on yourself. If you don't have a solid foundational sense of your self, you will be inclined to listen to what others have to say all the time and to be swayed by their insistence on what is wrong, right, and appropriate. When the self sense of others envelops your own self sense, you're caught up in the maze of otherness and you're not likely to find yourself any time soon.

Immerse yourself in solitude. Give yourself some time and space to get away from the expectations, the conversations, the noise, the media, and the pressure. Take some time each day to go for a long walk and think. Plant yourself on a park bench and look. Take a long, thoughtful road trip. Whatever you do, move away from anything that distracts you from contemplating your life and where you want it to go. In solitude, you should feel independent and self-sufficient, not lonely, needy or afraid. If the banter of co-workers, parents, friends, or strangers is getting you down, solitude can restore your sense of balance and inner calm, reminding you that you have a trajectory in life mapped out and that you're marching to it, not to the worries, fears, and hearsay of other people.

Keep a written record of your answers to the series of questions in the former step. Beyond your time spent in solitude (something that's important to indulge in regularly), it's easy for these purpose-focused thoughts to slip to the back of your mind and be forgotten. If you have them written down, then every time you reflect, you can review your notes and take it a step further, instead of answering the same questions all over again. Keep them in a notebook that's both easy to access and update wherever you happen to be; it will be a source of sustaining you and by which you can continue to measure your growth through life.

Act upon your newly discovered knowledge. Do the things that you want to do! Pick up those watercolors. Write a short story. Plan a trip to Mombasa, Mt Kenya, a walk at Nairobi Safari Walk. Have dinner with a family member. Start cracking jokes. Open up. Tell the truth. Whatever it is that you've decided you want to be or do, start being and doing it now.

Serve others. Mahatma Gandhi once said that "the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others". All introspection and no reaching out to others can cause you to navel-gaze and shut yourself off from others. Service to other people and to the community is the ultimate way to find purpose and a sense of your place in the world. When you get to see how hard life can be for those in greater need than you, it's often a wake-up call that puts your own worries, concerns, and petty issues into perspective. It helps you to see what you do have and the opportunities you've been able to seize through life. That can fuel a great sense of self because suddenly everything can fall into place for you and you realize what matters most. Try it. You'll like it.

I hope you will like my post! Because I wrote it with all my heart<3 XoXo anastasy

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